White Allyship with Tess Dimenna
Tell me a little bit about yourself!
My name is Tess Dimenna and I’m a 17 from NYC. I just graduated from Grace Church High School in Lower Manhattan
What does white allyship mean to you?
White allyship means being somebody who uplifts the voices of marginalized people, always willing to listen, asking how to be a better ally, walking besides someone not in front of. The book ‘Between the World and Me’ by Ta-Nehisi Coates got me interested in learning about police brutality and the #blacklivesmatter movement, which is the most pressing and pervasive matter right now. White guilt is a very common feeling of guilt and hopelessness while on the journey towards white allyship. It often leads to questions such as: what can I do to help? I believe it is an important stop on the road to allyship, but I urge people not wallow in white guilt, don’t make it about yourself rather than the people you are trying to be an ally to. Getting stuck in white guilt stops you from making important changes to yourself
What do you think common misconceptions of white allyship are?
White allyship can often turn into a white savior complex, which is looking for validation from being an ally. For example: posting pictures of mission trips, publicizing it, using it for your own gain. Another misconception is that you have to know everything. In reality, it’s a learning experience, part of it is asking questions and saying that you may not fully understand. It’s super important to have a willingness to listen and understand that you never had or will have the experience of a certain group.
What does it look like in your day to day life?
I practice white allyship in social media, through donations, volunteer work and talking to other people who can help. It can also be as simple as having a conversation with somebody. Recently, I’ve been using tik tok because there is such a wide range of people you can interact with.
Why do you think it’s important to remember?
If you have white privilege (meaning your race and physical appearance does not negatively affect your life or devalue you), it does not mean you do not have other struggles. It means you will never know certain fears or experiences of people of color, and we must give them validation and support in their experiences.
How do you think your white privilege affects your life and how do you think other people can use their white privilege in a positive way?
I’ve never been seen as a threat because of my race. Recently, I haven’t experienced the racial implications of covid-19 that have affected Asian Americans. Another example is in job interviews: because my name sounds european, it will never be written off by an employer. It started with little things, in middle and high school. I was raised to believe everyone's the same but soon realized they are not treated that way, I began noticing police brutality. I started listening and speaking to people affected and having difficult conversations. White allyship looks different for everyone, if you are not actively working against the racist system you are working with it through enabling it. It’s really important to recognize privilege. For example, I am a member of the LGBTQIA+, but still have the privilege of being white in that community and being in a straight relationship
What are you doing right now?
I’ve been sewing and distributing masks to front line workers and marginalized communities, such as indgenous people. Also researching the effects of covid-19 on marginalized communities and racism within the medical field. I learned that black women are often treated with less care because of stereotypes that they don’t feel as much pain, feeling less comfortable giving birth in a hospital. Lastly, I’ve been donating, researching, calling, protesting for BLM and black people, it’s extremely important to understand the relationship between cops and America historically and currently.
